A fine line...

Right so I've spent much of the day doing nothing.

But then I ended up chatting to a University friend about his romantic issues and it started off an interesting thought trail.

I have started to notice that acts of romance are only romantic if the receiver finds the giver attractive. Otherwise it is then considered 'creepy' or 'weird'.

For example if a guy serenades his girlfriend she is likely to find this act romantic because she has feelings for him. If, on the other hand, a shy guy from her class or work place, whom she does not have feelings for, does this she'd probably be on the phone to the police.

This annoys me. It just shows that there is no such thing as a romantic act in and of itself, there is only a romantic interpretation of an act.

I myself have had a fair few girlfriends so far in my time on this earth, so I know the agonising process of thinking of a brilliant romantic act, planning it, then carrying it out. Would I do this to a girl whom I have not already courted or at least learnt of an already existing romance? No probably not. Mostly because I am very shy when it comes to women so generally prefer not to shame myself. 

I have actually become shyer over the past few years when it comes to romantic feelings, even though I have become less shy generally. I think now I am older I can read situations better and know that 9 times out of 10, the girl doesn’t like you back.

This may sound like a pessimistic rant but it isn't. I just think people need to be careful and assess the situation fully. If, for example, I had a crush on the most popular and most beautiful girl on my course, I would know better than to ask her out because I simply am not on that level. I disagree with people who say "You can anyone you want!" rubbish. The real world just does not work like that. You can get away with it at first if you are new to a place but that is it.

I believe in compatibility. Some people just are not supposed to be together, which is why we feel attraction for some people and not others. Initial attraction can of course be over come when more important factors such as personality and beliefs come into the equation.

I seem to have gone off on a tangent there...

My main point is if you yourself find yourself being "creeped" out by someone's romantic actions towards you then just remember there has probably been a time when you have liked someone who didn’t feel the same way. and chances are you yourself have done something you thought was romantic but wasn’t taken that way.

DFTBA